Weeping Willows
by purplepagoda
Summary: Catherine's old habits die hard, even after she screws her life up royally.
1. Weeping Willows

1She sat there staring at herself in the mirror. She was screwed how was she going to explain this one. She knew what she had done was wrong.

_What did I do? I'm such an idiot._ She thought to herself. She momentarily cradled her head in her hands before she stood up. She looked at the plastic stick on the counter, to double check. It was the same as it had been the previous 9 times it still had a little plus sign on it. She had realized something was wrong earlier when she realized she was late, but she figured that maybe she had hit the big 'm' word, she was getting to that age, but then the vomiting started. This was a good way to spend Christmas eve. Lindsey had gone to sleep and it was the perfect time to take the test. She was having trouble facing reality. She slept with a married man, they both new it was wrong, but they both knew what their feelings toward the other was... but the fact was he was still married. Catherine positioned herself on the edge of the tub again, and wept. The next thing she knew it was daylight. She wiped her mascara covered face, thrown the test in the trash can, outside so Lindsey wouldn't find out, and waited for her to wake up.

New Years Eve: The team had somehow managed to finish up all their cases, and decided to have a celebration.

"Hey Catherine you want something to drink?" Warrick asks as he starts pouring her champagne into the plastic cup.  
"No, I'm fine, hey can I talk to you for a second?"  
"About what?"  
"A case, it will just take a second."  
"Yeah sure."  
Catherine silently drags him outside.  
"Why are we outside?"  
"I didn't want anyone to hear our conversation."  
"Oh. I thought this was about a case."  
"I lied."  
"Are you ok you don't look so good." Warrick asks as he notices that all color has drained from Catherine's face. Before Catherine can reply she pukes in the bushes near the place she had been standing.  
"So you're not ok."  
"No Warrick I'm not."  
"Tina said that flu season has been worse this year than any other she can remember."  
"I don't have the flu Warrick. It's something a little bit more long term."  
"Oh... I don't think I follow."  
"This whole charade that you and I have going on is about to blow up in our faces." Catherine says as she begins to cry.  
"Are you ok?"  
"No, I'm not. I'm not ok with any of this. I'm not ok with the fact that you chose her over me when you barely knew her for ten seconds. I'm not ok with the fact that you cheated on your wife with me when the two of you shouldn't be married in the first place." Catherine bellows in anger with tears streaming down her face.  
"Whoa slow down..."  
"You know what forget it, I don't want to deal with this right now." Catherine says without breathing while still crying after cutting Warrick off.  
"Why are you mad at me?"  
"Why not? It's your fault that I feel this way." Catherine wails as she turns to walk to her car. Warrick gently grabs her arm.  
"You can't drive not like this."  
"LET ME GO. I'm not going to deal with this tonight ok? I've got to get home to my daughter."  
"Ok." Warrick replies as he lets her walk away.

Warrick returns to the party.  
"Hey where'd Catherine go?"  
"She went home, she wanted to get home to Lindsey."

Warrick gives Catherine her space and tries to forget how angry she is at him.


	2. Anger Issues

1Mid-February:

"Hey Cath are you ok?" Warrick asked in concern as she winced.

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Uh huh."

He reverted his eyes to his work and suddenly heard a thunk. He looked over to where she had been standing, now she was on the ground, unconscious, and bleeding, there was so much blood he didn't know where it was coming from. He flipped open his phone and called the ambulance. With in a minute and a half they were in the same room scraping her off the floor like a bug. He didn't know what had happened they wouldn't tell him anything, he just sat silently in the ambulance holding her hand.

the hospital:

It had been hours and still he didn't know anything. A doctor finally came out.

"You can go in and see her now she's stable."

"What happened?"

"She started hemorrhaging."

"What caused it?"

"We thought she had a miscarriage. She didn't because you got help quickly. So luckily we were able to save the baby, and get her stable. She should be regaining consciousness soon. She lost a lot of blood and we had to do a blood transfusion, but she should recover quickly."

"Thank you." He replied not believing what he had heard. He walked to her room and sat down next to her. He kissed her on the forehead and held her hand. Luckily the team had let him take care of this, since he was the one that could best console her.

He had done wrong, betrayed his wife, for his true love. He loved the woman with all his soul and would die for her. He showed her what he could do for her, and now the woman he would die for could have died because of him. She opened her eyes and looked around disoriented. Once she realized where she was she looked at Warrick to ask him what happened.

"Why am I in the hospital?"

"You collapsed. And started bleeding profusely."

"What happened?"

"Uh..."

"Look at me." Catherine demanded as she pulled Warrick's face back toward her own. "What happened?"

"You almost miscarried."

"Oh."

"How are you so calm about this? And why didn't I know?"

"I'm not calm I just don't want to harp over something that could have happened."

"The doctor said you almost miscarried, and if I had waited any longer you probably would have."

"I... know..but Warrick I didn't."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I tried, but I couldn't."

"Why?"

"Because I hate you so much right now."

"Why what did I do?"

"Oh let me get out my list." Catherine says sarcastically.

"I'm serious."

"Well you have an affair with me, manage to get me pregnant. Then you have a change of heart, and you go back to your wife and pretend nothing happened. Do you have any idea what that did to me?"

"No, I'm sorry."

"You've got to figure this out."

"I don't know how to. I'm still technically married."

"She cheated on you."

"I cheated with you before that I just didn't get caught."

"I know, so what do you want to do about it?"

"How can I fix this?"

"I don't know, you didn't have to forgive her and get back together with her though."

"Let's not get into this right now you just need to relax."

"Fine whatever." Catherine replies with steam rolling out of her ears.

The doctor walks in as they finish they're conversation.

"I see you're awake."

"Yeah."

"How are you feeling?"

"Ok, I guess."

"I'm going to get a sonogram machine and bring it in here, just to double check that everything is ok."

"Ok."

The doctor walks out, and returns a few minutes later.

"Miss Willows I have a few questions for you."

"Ok."

"Did you know you were pregnant."

"Yes."

"How pregnant would you say you are?"

"I don't know around 12 weeks or so I guess."

"Ok. Thank you. Ok, this is going to be a little bit cold."

"Ok."

"It looks as if every thing is ok." The doctor states as he studies the screen carefully."It looks like you're actually a week or 2 off. I would say you're actually 13-14 weeks pregnant."

"Oh."

"Normally a miscarriage, or near miscarriage occurs during the first trimester. Have your stress levels been elevated lately?"

"Yes."

"Just try to get the stress levels down, and everything should be ok."

"Ok, thank you."

"Do you want to know the gender?"

"No, thanks." Catherine blurts out without consulting Warrick.

"Ok, well I'll just leave you two alone."

"Ok." The doctor walks out and Warrick, and Catherine are at it again.

"Is this how it's going to be between us from now on?" Warrick asks.

"Yeah. It is." Catherine answers true fully.

"Why are you so angry?"

"We went over this not to mention that I'm not ok with the fact for the next 18 years I've got another person I have to take care of, especially since I have to start over again when I have one kid 80 of the way raised."

"Catherine I'm sorry."

"Sorry doesn't cut it Warrick."

"I know, I want to try to fix it."

"You've fixed enough."

"When I want to see my kid is it going to be one big fight?"

"Hell yes. When you changed your mind you lost out on that chance."

"You aren't going to let me see my own kid?"

"Look we'll worry about it when we get closer to that point."

Warrick's phone rings he flips it open and answers. After a ten second phone conversation he hangs up and turns to Catherine.

"I've got to go back to the lab."

"Whatever."

the lab:

Nick and Warrick are working on the case Warrick had been on earlier when Nick notices something isn't right.

"Hey man what's on your mind?"

"Nothing."

"Come on spill."

"I was just thinking about how sometimes you never notice what you could have until you can't have it. And even though you're actions are wrong but your heart feels right when you try to get it you screw everything up."

"I know how you feel."

the hospital:

Catherine is sitting in the hospital bed crying when Lindsey walks in.

"Hey mom are you ok?"

Catherine wipes the tears from her face and then replies, "Yeah, I'm fine."

"So why are you in the hospital?"

"Is your grandma around?"

"She went to the cafeteria."

"Oh."

"So why are you in the hospital."

"It's a long story."

"Can I hear it?"

"No."

"Well will you at least tell me the basic reason you're in the hospital?"

"Yes... I passed out at work, and I started bleeding."

"What happened?"

"You know what I'll tell you if you promise not to mention one word of it to your grandmother, I'll do that ok?"

"Ok."

"I almost had a miscarriage."

"But that would mean..."

"Yes it would."

"But... never mind I don't want or need to know."

"Good."

"So how long are you going to be in the hospital?"

"Just over night. Then I get to take about a week off work."

"Really?"

"Yeah. And I might even let you skip a day."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

"Can we go shopping?"

"For what?"

"For fun..." Lindsey says puzzled.

"No I mean like what do you want to get while we're shopping?"

"I don't know... I just like shopping."

"I know."


	3. Decisions

Catherine was trying to keep it together over her time off work but it wasn't so easy. The last morning of her vacation after dropping Lindsey off at school she lost it. She went back to bed and couldn't stop crying. She felt like her heart had been ripped out and stepped on then put back in. She didn't know what to do. She was aware that she was supposed to be happy, but she wasn't she was just angry all the time. Angry at the world. Suddenly the phone rings and jolts her back to reality.  
"Hello?"  
"Miss Willows, this is Dr. Green's office I just wanted to call and remind you that you have an appointment with her today at noon."  
"Thank you." Catherine replies as she hangs up the phone.

the doctor's appointment:  
"Hi Catherine."  
"Hi Dr. Green."  
"How are you feeling?"  
"Fine."  
"I heard about your hospital visit."  
"Yeah."  
"So I'm going to ask you a few questions ok?"  
"Ok."  
"Have you had any morning sickness?"  
"No."  
"Good."  
"So you've been taking it easy the past few days right?"  
"Yeah."  
"I'm going to do a ultrasound so I can have a look at the baby."  
"Ok."  
"Everything looks perfectly fine which makes me wonder why you had a near miscarriage."  
"I've been dealing with a lot of stress lately."  
"That's understandable. If at all possible try to avoid what is causing your stress, and your pregnancy will be much smoother."  
"Ok."  
"So do you want to know the gender?"  
"Um... no."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yeah."  
"Ok, well everything looks good so you can go back to work tomorrow."  
"Ok, thanks."

The following day:  
"Hey Catherine are you feeling better?" Grissom asks as he spots Catherine walking in.  
"Yeah."  
"Good."  
"So where do you want me?"  
"I want you to go round up Greg..."  
"And do what with him?" Catherine asks after cutting Grissom off.  
"Help him with his case."  
"Ok."  
The day was normal, and she managed to avoid Warrick but she knew this wasn't going to work.

home later on:

"Hello?" Catherine says as she answers the phone.  
"Hey can we talk."  
"About what Warrick."  
"About us."  
"There is no _us_ anymore."  
"But..."  
"But what?"  
"I don't want you to be angry with me."  
"Too late."  
"Warrick don't make me hate you more than I already do."  
"Can we talk about this?"  
"We can talk when I'm ready to talk."  
"Ok."  
"Goodbye." Catherine hangs up the phone angrily.

She racked her brain trying to figure out what she was supposed to do. Failing to find answer she turns on the T.V. She sees a commercial for travel brochures to Los Angeles.

"Lindsey."  
"What?" She asks as she enters Catherine's room.  
"Do you know where the phone book is?"  
"The one on top of the fridge?"  
"Yes."  
"What about it?"  
"Will you bring it to me?"  
"Sure."  
A few seconds later Lindsey returns with the phone book.  
"Who are you calling."  
"Just a friend. Go finish your homework and we'll talk about this when I'm off the phone."  
"Ok." Lindsey agrees knowing that her mom has a plan of some sort and to just stay out of the way.

Catherine dials Sam Braun.  
"Hello?"  
"Hi Sam."  
"Catherine is that you?"  
"Yeah, I was wondering if you could do me a favor."  
"Do you need money?"  
"No, more like a job."  
"Did you get fired?"  
"No, but I've decided I want to go to a different place."  
"Oh?"  
"I was wondering if you knew any of the law enforcement in L.A."  
"Sure I do."  
"Do you think you could get me a position there as a C.S.I.?"  
"Yeah just let me make a few phone calls and I'll call you back."  
"Thank you."  
"You're welcome."

Catherine hangs up the phone and calls for Lindsey.  
"Hey I need to talk to you."  
"About what?"  
"Sit down." Catherine says as she motions to a spot on the bed.  
"Ok."  
"What would you say if I told you we were moving?"  
"It depends on where we would hypothetically be moving to."  
"Hypothetically we'd be moving to L.A."  
"I'd miss my friends but I'd adjust and make new ones. So hypothetically yes."  
"And non-hypothetically?"  
"Yes."  
"Good."  
"Mom can I ask you something?"  
"Sure what?"  
"Would this have anything to do with the baby or something relating to it."

Before Catherine can answer the phone rings. She picks it up on the first ring.  
"Hello?"  
"Muggs I've found a job for you."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes."  
"When do I have to start?"  
"As soon as your 2 weeks notice is up. I also had someone find you a house."  
"I can't afford a house in L.A."  
"I know that's why I'm paying for it."  
"I can't..."  
"It's in a fabulous neighborhood. Let me put it this way it isn't for you it's for Lindsey. Let me do this one thing for you. I know you don't like handouts but let me do this."  
"Ok."  
"Good."  
"Thank you."  
"You're welcome."  
"Bye." Catherine hangs up the phone and takes a breath of relief.  
"So?"  
"So you need to get packing."  
"Mom we're seriously moving?"  
"Yeah."  
"When?"  
"In 2 weeks."  
"Oh."


	4. Resignation

1 work the following day:

Catherine walks into Grissom's office and sits down.  
"What do you need?"  
"Here." Catherine says as she hands him a packet of neatly stapled papers.  
"What's this?"  
"It's my resignation."  
"Excuse me."  
"It's my resignation, 2 weeks notice whatever you want to call it."  
"You can't quit."  
"I'm sorry Grissom but I can't stay."  
"May I ask why?"  
"It's in the papers."  
"It says conflict of interest. What does that mean?"  
"Why don't you ask Warrick." Catherine says as she walks out the door.

Later on: Grissom sees Warrick and calls him into his office.  
"Warrick come in here for a second please."  
"What did I do?"  
"You tell me. Catherine gave me her resignation earlier."  
"Why are you talking to me about it?"  
"Because she said to ask you why she stated conflict of interest as her reason for quitting."  
"Look I don't know."  
"What do you mean you don't know? You just cost this team one of it's biggest assets. I don't know what you did but you better fix it before her 2 weeks is up, or we'll both be canned."  
"We won't be canned."  
"Yes we will the only reason I'm not out of here now is because Catherine wouldn't let Ecklie give her my job. If it were up to me or him she'd run the place."  
"It isn't my fault."  
"Don't tell me it's not your fault when you know it is. I don't care what you did but you better fix it."

Across the hall:  
Nick, Sara and Greg are processing evidence and can hear Grissom yelling, but not what he's yelling about.  
"Wonder why Grissom is ripping Warrick's ass?" Sara asks.  
"I don't know." Nick says he shakes his head.  
"I do." Greg chimes in.  
"How?" Nick asks in curiosity.  
"Because I'm special." Greg replies.  
"Yeah special ed." Nick retorts.  
"Ow." Sara says giving her 2 cents worth.  
"Do you want to know or not?" Greg asks.  
"Yeah." Sara practically begs.  
"Catherine is quitting, and when Grissom asked why she told him to ask Warrick."  
"Catherine's quitting?" Sara asks in shock.  
"Yes I am." Catherine replies as she enter the room. "I knew my ears were burning."  
"Why are you quitting?" Sara wonders in astonishment.  
"I just need a change I can't do this job right now."  
"Why not?" Greg inquires in a state of stupidity.  
"Because you can't raise a kid in Las Vegas."  
"Um isn't it a little late, I mean Lindsey's almost raised." Sara blurts out without a moments consideration.  
"If I knew then what I knew now I would have moved when Lindsey was born. But I have a chance to make it up so I'm going to."  
"I don't follow." Nick states.  
"She's pregnant dummy." Greg screeches.  
"No she's not. How would you know?" Sara directs at Greg.  
"Actually I am." Catherine replies to Sara.  
"How does Greg now?"  
"Uh he's better at his job than you are?" Catherine directs at Sara. Normally it would bother Sara, but she was too entangled in the fact that Catherine was pregnant.  
"But who?" Greg asks.  
"Who do you think?" Catherine answers as she leaves the room.  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Sara asks in a state of oblivion.  
"Sara seriously." Greg scoffs.  
"No I'd like to know too." Nick answers.  
"Dude..."  
Before Greg can finish Nick and Sara turn toward each other. "No you don't think?" Is all either can say.

After work:  
"Catherine wait." Warrick calls out as he chases her to her car.  
"What do you want?" She snaps when she reaches her car and he catches up with her.  
"I want to talk."  
"Why don't you think you've already done enough damage?"  
"I want to know how to fix it."  
"You can't fix it."  
"Why not?"  
"Because you'll never leave your precious Tina."  
"Where are you going?"  
"Why does it matter?"  
"Because I want to be there for my kid."  
"If you really wanted to be there for your kid you would leave Tina."  
"What does Tina have to do with this?"  
"Everything." Catherine says as she starts the car. "I advise you move, unless you want to get run-over."  
Warrick steps out of the way just as Catherine backs out of her spot.


	5. Water under the bridge

1Catherine's last day: The whole team is sitting in the break room.  
"I've got something for you."  
"Greg do I really want to open this?"  
"I think you do."  
"Aw Greg." Catherine says as she pulls his infamous hat out of a gift bag.  
"What are you guys doing?"  
"Ecklie it's Catherine's last day can't you just let us have a nice day."  
"Fine, but you're all working over time tomorrow."  
"Fine." Grissom replies as he pulls out his gift.  
Catherine eagerly unwraps it.  
"Your butterfly."  
"Catherine how many times do I have to tell you it's a moth?"  
"Yeah Catherine come on. It's a moth." Nick mocks.  
"I've got to go."  
"Why?"  
"I have to pick Lindsey up from school we still have some packing to do."

Each team member hugs her. Sara slips a note into Catherine's jacket pocket, and then Catherine leaves.  
Lindsey's school:  
"Hi mom."  
"Hey kiddo. Did you have a good day?"  
"Yes."  
"What's in your pocket."  
"Nothing."  
"Then what's this?" Lindsey asks as she pulls an envelope from Catherine's pocket.  
"I don't know. I'll read it later and tell you."  
"Ok."  
"We have to home and finish packing."  
"Mom we're done."  
"We still have to pack up our beds remember?"  
"No we don't."  
"Yes we do."  
You fell asleep on the couch last night."  
"So?"  
"So I disassembled the beds and took of the covers."  
"Thank you."

home: When Catherine arrives home a moving caravan of moving trucks and a limo are waiting on her.  
"Mom who's in the limo?" Lindsey asks as she gets out of the car.  
"Stay there I have a good idea of who it is." Catherine walks over to the limo and taps on the window. The door opens and Sam steps out.  
"I had a feeling it was you. What are you doing here?"  
"I'm moving you."  
"No you're not."  
"The stuff is already in the trucks."  
"Ok, thank you."  
"I'm not going to let you drive all night to L.A. I'm flying you in my jet."  
"Whoa."  
"Catherine come on. Let me make up for lost time."  
"Fine."  
Catherine said her goodbyes to the house and her mother and then went to the airport.  
On the plane:  
Lindsey is in a room playing video games while. Sam and Catherine are sitting in the cabin.  
"Would you like something to drink?"  
"No thank you I'm fine Sam."  
"Come on it will calm your nerves."  
"No Sam I can't."  
"I'll make sure some one drives you."  
"That's not why I don't want to."  
"Fine. So do you think that Lindsey will be needing a nanny?"  
"Why would she need a nanny she's 12."  
"She's 12 and in L.A. you'll be working a lot and L.A. is even more dangerous than Las Vegas."  
"I don't think Lindsey needs a nanny."  
"Ok. So why is it you can't drink? Is there something wrong with your health?"  
"No my health is fine."  
"Then what is it?"  
"I'm pregnant."  
"Oh, it all makes sense now."  
"What are you talking about?"  
"Suddenly wanting to move away from Las Vegas. To get away from your co-workers. Which one is it? It's Warrick isn't it."  
"Ok, when I asked for your help I didn't know it would mean that you would need to know everything about it."  
"Sorry. But it is his right?"  
"Yes." Catherine sighs.  
"I'm sorry you have to go through all of this."  
"So how big is the house any way?" Catherine asks trying to change the subject.  
"Only 4 bedrooms. I figured that if I bought a million dollar home you would be really angry. It's big, but its not a mansion."  
"How many rooms in total?"  
"I don't know you'll just have to look at it when you get there."  
"Ok."


	6. Leftover worry

1First full week of June:

Catherine was determined to let her work life stay at work this time, and not cross over to her life outside of work. She wasn't going to let herself slip again. Who knows what kind of situation she would end up in this time if she did. Catherine was busy at work, and gave Lindsey the credit card to use. Which was probably a mistake, but Lindsey was pretty responsible. Catherine had just gotten home and saw several empty boxes in the living room. She called up the stairs for Lindsey.

"Lindsey!"

"What?"

"What are all of these boxes from?"

"I'll tell you when you get back."

"From where?"

"I ordered Chinese."

"They deliver."

"I said you were going to pick it up."

"Fine, but I expect an explanation when I get back."

"Fine."

20 minutes later Catherine gets home.

"Lindsey would you come down stairs please?"

"Yeah I'm coming."

"Were you in a war?" Catherine asks as she looks at her daughter who is covered in various substances.

"No, come on."

"Where are we going?" Catherine asks as Lindsey pulls her up the stairs.

"Lindsey did you max out the credit card?"

"Nope."

"Hold on I can't go as fast as you."

"Sorry."

Lindsey races up the stairs, and Catherine slowly trudges up them.

"What are we doing?"

"Come here." Lindsey whines as she pulls her mother toward the end of the hall.

"Are you ready?"

"For what?" Catherine asks in fear as Lindsey stops at the door in front of her.

"Close your eyes."

"Ok." Lindsey opens the door and leads her in.

"Lindsey it reeks in here."

"It smells like paint right?"

"Yes. Why?" Catherine remarks impatiently.

"Open."

"What did you do?" Catherine asks as she stares at the room.

"I just wanted to help. I figured you would never get around to getting a nursery done so I did it for you."

"I was going to do it."

"Mom, you're 7 months pregnant."

"So?"

"So quit complaining. Do you like it?"

"Yes. Who painted the mural?" Catherine requests as she stares at the baby animals on the wall.

"I did."

"You did this?"

"Yeah."

"Lindsey, it's beautiful. Thank you."

"You're not mad?"

"No. It's one less thing I have to do."

"So when are you going to tell me what the baby is?"

"When it's born."

"Mom!" Lindsey shrieks as she throws a throw pillow at Catherine.

"Sorry. So is the paint dry? Cause if not all the furniture is going to have paint on it."

"It's dry, I painted it a few days ago. It still smells because the door was shut."

"Let's go eat."

"Ok."

The road had been hard, but it was beginning to get smoother. Lindsey adjusted to school after a few days, and was an 'A' student. The summer allowed her to express her creative juices. Catherine loved her job. She was the supervisor. Day shift. She loved being home when Lindsey got home from school. Catherine knew it wouldn't last. As soon as the baby was born she was going to have problems. Warrick hadn't found her yet, but he would. At least she thought he would. She never knew with him.


	7. Appearances

August 18th: Catherine's cell phone rings. She had just barely gotten in the door. She drops the groceries, and rummages for her phone.

"Hello?"  
"Catherine?"  
"Sara?"  
"Get a new phone number."  
"What?"  
"The team is in town, and Warrick figured out your new number. I managed to get it away from him, but I'm not sure how long it'll last."  
"Thanks."  
"You're welcome."  
"So why are you guys in town?"  
"Cross over."  
"I have a feeling I'll be getting a call soon."  
"Probably."  
"I've got to go I'm getting a beep."  
"Ok bye."

Catherine answers her phone, and it's the sheriff he needs her at the office, she says she'll be on her way.  
"Lindsey come put the groceries away I've got to go."  
"I'm coming."  
"Thank you." Catherine responds when Lindsey picks up the groceries.  
"Mom you can't go."  
"Why?"  
"Because I thinkyour water just broke."  
"What?"  
"Look."  
"Oh crap. I'm going to call in. You put the groceries away."  
"Ok."  
With in 15 minutes they're at the hospital. An hour later Catherine is situated in a room.  
"So is this how you imagined you'd be spending you're Friday night?"  
"Not exactly mom. So who was on the phone earlier?"  
"Sara."  
"Sara? What did she want?"  
"The team is in L.A."  
"Why?"  
"Cross over."  
"Oh. That's cool."  
"No it's not."  
"Why not?"  
"Because Warrick will be here."  
"So?"  
"Never mind."  
"Wait. Warrick is the baby's... dad? So how are you going to keep him away?"  
"Yeah. I don't know how I'm supposed to keep him away."

3 hours later: There was still no sign of Warrick, but pretty soon there would be a baby.  
"Miss Willows on the next contraction I want you to start pushing."  
"Ok."

An hour later: Catherine is a nice shade of red. When the doctor finally says: "One more push Miss Willows, and you'll have a baby."  
"Good." Catherine screeches as the doctor pulls the baby out.  
"It's a boy." The doctor bellows over the wailing baby as he hands Catherine the plump baby boy.

The following evening: Warrick still hasn't found Catherine, and she's getting ready to leave the hospital.  
"Lindsey put the baby in the car seat so we can go."  
"I will as soon as you give him a name."  
"Lindsey!"  
"Come on you have to give him a name."  
"Such as?"  
"I don't know."  
"Fine give me a second."  
"One, one million... ok time's up."  
"Milo."  
"Milo what?"  
"I don't know you decide."  
"Elijah."  
"Ok. Now can we go?"  
"Yes." Lindsey huffs as she gently places the little boy into the car seat.  
"Whoa. Where's the fire?" Warrick asks as he stops them at the door.  
"Warrick I told you to stay out of this."  
"Can we talk for a minute please. Just hear me out."  
"Fine, Lindsey will you go to the car?"  
"What for?"  
"To get his clothes."  
"He's wearing clothes."  
"Yeah hospital clothes, now go please."  
"Ok." Lindsey hands her mother the baby and leaves with the keys.  
"Warrick what do you want?"  
"I know you don't want me to have contact with him, but will you please at least let me see him this once?"  
"Did you tell Tina?"  
"NO. Catherine just let me hold him, I'm not going to take him from you. I know you know what you're doing, and I'm not taking him from you, but is it wrong to want to see my own kid?"  
"No, but Warrick you won't admit he's yours."  
"Yes I will."  
"To me maybe."  
"Please."  
"Fine sit down."  
"Why?"  
"You don't have that much experience and I don't want you to drop him."  
"Fine." Catherine hands the chunky, little boy to Warrick. Warrick stares at the little boy's chubby cheeks, golden complection, and dark wavy brown hair.  
"He's so little."  
"Not really. He's average he weighed 7 lbs 6 oz."  
"He's ok right?"  
"Yes he's perfectly fine."  
"So what's his name?"  
"Milo Elijah."  
"This one?" Lindsey asks as she re-enters the room with a blue outfit with a little blue bear on it.  
"Yeah. Warrick..."  
"Right." Warrick kisses Milo on the forehead and places him back in Catherine's awaiting arms.  
Catherine sits in silence as she dresses the baby, and wraps him up.  
"Ready?"  
"Aren't you going to put him in the car seat?"  
"Yeah as soon as I go fill out his birth certificate."  
"Ok."  
About an hour later when Lindsey and Catherine reach the car Lindsey secures the car seat and then reaches for Milo. Catherine is reluctant to let go of the baby afraid that some how someone would take him from her.  
"Mom, you have to put him in the car seat."  
"I know."  
As Catherine drives home she tries to decide what to do about Warrick. She begins rethinking her decision about moving. She looks back at the little boy in her back seat. He is peacefully sleeping. His tiny golden hand is on his tiny face. She momentarily opens his blue eyes and then closes them again. Catherine realizes that Warrick wouldn't be there even if she let him. And her little boy doesn't need a father... at least not one named Warrick.


	8. Little boy blue

After maternity leave Catherine allowed Sam to hire a nanny. Catherine was adjusting to the situation. Milo was 3 months old and was sleeping through the night most of the time so she felt safe to start dating again tired of seeing dead people, and spit up all day. She had met a nice guy named Jack and started dating him. The first few dates went smoothly. Then one night after a nice evening out they got a little carried away and were making out on her couch. He was supposed to drop her off and leave, but it didn't work that way. As they were making out Catherine suddenly pushed him off.

"What did I do?"

"Nothing could you just hold on a second?"

"Sure."

Catherine listened for a second and then realized the baby wasn't crying so she turned back to him.

"Everything ok?"

"Yeah. But I don't want to do this tonight."

"Ok." Jack replies as he gets up to go.

"Wait don't leave."

"Why not?"

"I want to get to know you better."

"Ok."

Some how they end up horizontal on the couch. Things are getting hot and heavy when Catherine hears the baby cry. She pushes Jack off her and starts up the stairs.

"What did I do?" Jack says as Catherine disappears up the stairs. Catherine finds Milo sleeping peacefully and then runs back down the stairs.

"What did I do?" Jack repeats when Catherine reappears.

"Nothing,"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah,"

Catherine hears the baby again, only this time he's crying loudly.

"Is that a baby?"

Catherine doesn't respond, she just rushes back up the stairs to get the baby. This time when she reaches Milo's room, he's wailing. She picks him up, and starts to soothe him. He doesn't quit crying. She figures he's hungry, but she decides she should give him a binky while she makes a bottle. Of course she can't find a binky, so she improvises and uses her finger. He stops crying. While her finger is in her mouth she realizes what the problem is. She feels a tiny tooth starting to come in. She takes him downstairs to get the baby orajel out of his diaper bag. She completely forgets about having Jack in the living room. She puts the gel on the baby's gums, and heads toward the stairs when Jack calls out.

"Catherine?"

Without thinking she walks back into the living room.

"Yeah?" She answers with the baby on her hip.

"Whoa..."

"I'm sorry to leave you like that, but he was crying."

"You have a baby?"

"Yeah, didn't I mention that?"

"No you didn't."

"Oh..."

"Well why don't you go put him back in bed, and we can start where we left off."

"You're kidding me right?" Catherine asks in disgust.

"No."

"My kid needs me, I'm not going to just put him back to bed. My kids are more important than any man. If you don't understand that I think you need to leave."

"He's a baby he won't know the difference."

"He's teething..."

"He's asleep." Jack says cutting her off.

"It doesn't matter. I need to be with him in case he gets a fever."

"He'll be fine."

"I'm not going to put the health of my son in jeopardy for some jerk."

"I'm not a jerk."

"I don't think you understand what I'm trying to tell you. I want you to leave. I want you to leave now. I don't want to see you again."

"I'll leave when I'm good and ready."

"Don't make me call the police."

"Ooh you're so scary."

"And you're drunk. Now get out of my house."

"No."

Catherine lays the baby on the couch, and then pushes Jack out the door.

"I'm not leaving." He threatens as Catherine pushes him to the door.

Luckily Catherine has yet to take her heels off. She kicks him where the sun don't shine.

"Guess you don't have to worry about having any babies. Now leave or I'll kick you again."

"Fine." He says as she runs off. Catherine closes the door, and sets the security alarm. In that moment she realized that she was restarting a vicious cycle. Meaningless relationships where she'd just end up getting hurt, and breaking promises to her family. Her kids were the most important thing in her life now. They always would be. She left Las Vegas to escape her problems, and she wasn't going to let herself create more. It was enough. She was sick of indirectly causing herself pain and heartache. She didn't need a man to make her happy. What had she been thinking. She knew the outcome. Sometimes it turned out worse than others. She was done with that part of her life.


End file.
